#GirlBoner Gifts: Super Sexy Stocking Stuffers

“A wise lover values not so much the gift of the lover as the love of the giver.”  —Thomas á Kempis

Have you ever received a gift so wonderfully thoughtful you about melted like Frosty in a heatwave? *sigh* I sure have. It’s not the price or magnitude of gifts that counts, but the spirit in which they’re given and the thoughtfulness the giver invests. I can’t think of many gifts more loving than those that enhance intimacy, relaxation and erotic pleasure. Bestowing such gifts on ourselves can add sparkle to our own holidays. Consider them Girl Boners to your Girl Boner. 😉

When choosing a sensual gift for another, make sure you consider their wants and needs, versus purely your own. (Giving lingerie to a woman who’s not comfortable wearing it is about as thoughtful as giving a woman who practically lives in lacy negligees frumpy flannels.) If you’re unsure whether a sexy gift is within your partner’s comfort or pretty-please zone, ask! You may be surprised by the response. And besides, sensual talk is sexy! The convo. itself may become a gift, IYKWIM.

Sexy stocking stuffers

 Another fabulous option? Fill a stocking with sexy gifts for you and your love to share. Isn’t that what the holidays are really about? Whether shared or savored on your own, the following gifts may be just what you need to set the festive flames  a-roaring! Peruse the  recommendations from me and a few of favorite sex-positive peeps, then let us know in the comments which ones most entice you! Have ideas of your own to add? We’d love to hear those, too.

1. Aloe Cadabra Gift Set

Lubricants are one of the best ways to make sex more savory and orgasmic—and Aloe Cadabra lubricants are my FAVE! They have a luxurious non-sticky consistency, taste and smell delectable and since they’re aloe-based, they promote supple skin. Gift set: $29.95 Individual: $9.95 via AloeCadabra.com

Aloe Cadabra Valentine's gift box

2. Sensual Massage Oil

Little says I love and lust for you as supremely as a sensual massage. This organic oil by the Body Shop is moisturizing, non-greasy and scented with Tahitian vanilla and other ingredients said to provide aphrodisiac benefits. $18.00 retail, $14.00 via Amazon.com

sensual oil

3. Love Coupons

Hoping for a 2014 filled with sensual play and romance? Love coupons provide a primo way to share your fantasies and celebrate your partner’s, setting the stage for a sultry year. LoveCoup allows you to create customized vouchers using fun graphics, choosing everything from gender and face shape to hair color, and text of your choosing. $24.95 via LoveCoup.com

Love coupon 3

4. Kama Sutra Getaway Kit

This romantic getaway kit can help ensure sensual sizzle whether you travel or celebrate holidays stay-cation style at home. The convenient travel case comes with sample-size lubricant and body oil, sweet honeysuckle honey dust, a feather applicator, French Vanilla Crème Body Soufflé cream and a scented romance candle. $34.99 via KamaSutra.com

Getaway Kit

5. Candy Cane Undies 

What better way to show your man how sweet his penis is than with candy casing? Or by inviting him to enjoy all your Girl Boner has to offer with , “If you lick my candy cane, I’ll stuff your stocking” panties? If you and your guy find thongs as uncomfy as I do, fear not. These won’t be worn long! Or maybe they’ll just make you both laugh—also groovy. His: $11.24 via Amazon  Hers: $13.99 via Cafe Press

candy cane underwear his and hers

6. Loving and Lasting: How to Stay Tuned In and Turned On in Your Marriage

For you married pairs, this book edited by the phenomenal Chief Passion Curator of Bring Back Desire and host of the Loving and Lasting Radio Show Ande Lyons is a must have! It’s brimming with useful insight from 20 of her favorite romance experts on ways to reignite lost passion, better communicate with your spouse and have a heck of a lot of fun in the process. Pop it in your honey’s virtual stocking! $2.99 via Amazon.


7. Vanilla Bondage Kit

This sexy suggestion comes from my friend and fellow blogger, Kitt Crescendo.”I love this product because it’s great for a little sensation play without being too scary or intimidating!” she said.”It can be used to play ‘Guess That Food’ (a la 9 1/2 weeks) or to explore your partner’s body without worrying about what they might be thinking.”  Kitt said she’d trace chocolate words on her lover’s body then make him decode the lick-able message. (YUM!) The silky, cream-colored restraints come neatly stored in a sweet container. $15.00 via Pure Romance

vanilla bondage

8. LELO Ida Vibrator

Ande Lyons, Passion Curator at Bring Back Desire, calls this vibrator for couples absolutely delicious. “The demonstration video will have your #GirlBoner jumping for joy!” she said. Worn in your vagina during sensual play, this toy stimulates your G-spot and clitoris while bringing a stimulating buzz to your man’s penis. (*August melts.*) $199 via My Secret Luxury


9. F*ck Me Perfume Potion

This come-hither concoction was formulated by Yolanda Shoshana, a Clairvoyant Seduction Alchemist with Girl Boner gusto to boot! “I love this perfume potion because it oozes seduction and sex,” she said. “It is deep, exotic and downright erotic.” Best of all, its mysterious notes are designed to inspire self love, confidence and passion. LOVE. $38.00 via Courtesan Charm


10. Bombshell Orgasm Balm 

Because all of our lips need TLC! This yummy balm contains all-natural ingredients geared toward enhancing arousal and orgasm. Apply a tiny amount to your clitoris and labia before foreplay for intensified pleasure. Perfect for spontaneous sexy play on-the-go, you won’t want to leave home without it! $9.99 via LoveHoney.com

Orgasm balm

Simple and DIY Ideas:

  • A hand-written, sensual love letter
  • Homemade heart-cookies with sexy messages
  • A framed sensual quote or photo
  • Bubble bath with sexy instructions involving you!
  • Sexy decorated undies!
  • A blindfold (The real gift will be what you do with/to once it’s on!)
  • Sexy shoes or panty hoes
  • Tingling lip gloss 
  • A water-proof notepad for writing saucy notes to your partner mid-naked steam! 
  • Naughty (meaning oh-so-nice!) chocolates

I’d love to hear your thoughts! Which items entice you? What goodies would you add to the list? Remember, you can also connect with me and the #Girl Boner community via Facebook and Twitter! ♥

#GirlBoner Gifts and Sex Toy Basics

"Did she just do that without me?"

Some gifts just keep…on….giving.

Like many women, it took me a while to figure these particular gifts out.

If you’ve been following my Girl Boner series, you know that after years as a serial monogamist, going from one serious relationship to another, I allowed myself sexually explorative single-time in Los Angeles. I knew my habits were bordering on excessive when my friend “Cassie,” a celebrity’s daughter with a never ending virtual black book, suggested I cool it down.

“You don’t need to have sex so…often,” she told me during one of our countless girl-talk/no-carb meatloaf fests. “Use your vibrator.”

I laughed and squirted ketchup on the pseudo-yucko food. “Right...”

Silence. Squinty-eyed stare. “Tell me you have have a vibrator,” she said.

I couldn’t. I didn’t. And Cassie isn’t one to let things slide…

That same week, I’d started a part-time job as a film producer’s assistant. The flexible hours, wages and free board in a gorgeous Hollywood hills home with two other female assistants seemed dandy. Truth be told, I took the job largely because of my room—a Victorian mansion-style library with books from floor to sky-high ceiling. *book boner* I should’ve known it was too good to be true…

My second day on the job, the producer had a chair-throwing temper tantrum over a misplaced file. When the anger turned toward me, I gathered my things and fled.  The next day, the producer called me, apologized for his behavior, told me he’d received my package and asked me to dinner.

His package? So offset by him and the invitation, I declined and hung up without inquiring. When I detailed the happenings to Cassie, she flipped out. The delivery he’d received and presumably opened had been sent to me, with love from Cassie: a hot pink, buzzing Eroto-Rabbit and vibrator starter kit.

Agh! That was the beginning of a rather lengthy, sporadic sex toy pursuit. Once I finally owned and began using them, I understood Cassie’s reaction. Big time. Wow. I mean… WOW.

What matters about the story is this:

Personal sexuality is an ever evolving journey. Whether we become sexually explorative early, come about growth through awkward means or begin stepping out of comfortable zones decades-plus in, there are adventures, new experiences and deeper pleasure and intimacy to be had. Like other significant aspects of our lives, sexuality shouldn’t be ignored or wrought with complacency.

Perhaps your sex life is chock-full of WOW. If not, or even if it is, sex toys can add joy to the holidays and beyond. While they can’t replace intimate connections with human beings, they can enhance them and teach us about our bodies in ways no sex ed class could.

Sex Toys 101: The Three Most Common for Women


As the name suggests, vibrators are electronic sex toys that help us rattle our way to pleasure and orgasm. The most common varieties stimulate the clitoris, or “joy button,” located between the inner-vaginal lips. Originally invented to treat hysteria (i.e., emotional sensitivity and mood swings related to deprivation) during the Victorian era, vibrators are one of the best ways to experience intense pleasure and arousal, says Dr. Laura Berman.

Different colored vibrators in one line

A vibrating threesome of pleasure


If you’ve dreamed of having more than one penis to play with or one of your desired shape and size to use while masturbating, dildos may be your bedroom BFF. They’re shaped like penises and function similarly stimulation-wise. They also come in a variety of sizes and materials, and may provide special features, such as vibration. This dildo, the Sexflesh Devilish Darren with a suction cup, sells for $18 on Amazon.


Your own personal penis

G-spot Stimulators

The G-spot is an area on the front of the vaginal wall, about one to two inches within. Not all women have one, but if you do, aye carumba. It’s worth…nurturing. 😉 Stimulating the G-spot and clitoris simultaneously is known to facilitate multiple, mind-blowing orgasms in some women. Dr. Berman recommends G-spot stimulator play as a useful way to find your G-spot. Simply insert it in your vagina and let the fun-filled search begin. You can purchase the Don Wand Bent Glass Pleasure Wand goes for $16 on Amazon.


For lovin’ your OMG-spot

**If you don’t experience vaginal G-spot orgasms, fret not. We’re all different and can experience pleasure in a variety of unique and wonderful ways.

10 Sexy Stocking Stuffers:

Based on my research, the following gifts could make your Girl Boner sparkle this holiday season. (If you don’t celebrate Christmas, even better. There’s only so much one can fit in a stocking…)

1. The Liptrick Speaking of stealth sex on the go, this vibrator is disguised as lipstick! It’s perfect for holiday travel while in proximity of nosy relatives and luggage inspectors. $26.50 Amazon.com

2. Sensual Essence Gel Lubricants can help expedite and enhance arousal and guard against pain. This gel is odorless, tasteless and paraben-free. It’s also a convenient size for traveling. $12.95 MyPleasure.com

3. His and Hers Pleasure Rings Fun for couples, this vibrating set is cute, quiet, easy to clean and non-intimidating. $34.95 MyPleasure.com

4. Pink Kink Tickling Kit If you watched 40 Days and 40 Nights and wondered if you, too, could orgasm from the sensual play of a flower laced over your body, this kit is for you. The blindfold and soft, “tickle” whip seem like valuable options, particularly if prefer the notion of tickle-torture to conventional whips. $28 Babeland.com

5. Vibrating Panties Based on the description, they could be worth the hefty price tag. A hidden pocket holds a clitoral stimulator, which can be operated by remote control from up to 12 feet away. For a larger than size 10, adjustable option, check out these Booty Parlor Turn Me On Panties. $89.95 MyPleasure.com

6. American Whopper Dong with Harness Okay, not the sexiest name. But a little role reversal can really spice things up. Entre strap ons. Use the dildo on its own or strap it on for pleasure with your partner. $39.95 Adam&Eve.com

7. XXXopoly If you’re looking for a fun way to turn up the heat without coming up with the ideas and suggestions, this game will well worth a larger stocking. Each space you land on dictates a sexual task, from kissing to intercourse. You’ll venture through a Red Light District, Hot and Heavy and Erotic cards, and probably won’t have to pass GO to get going. $34.95 Amazon.com

8. Edible Undies I can’t vouch for the flavor, but apparently it improves with licking. Hmm… $3.95 Dear-Lady.com

9. Naughty Lovers Pleasure Kit Being dominated is one of women’s most common sexual fantasies, says Dr. Kit Hilda Hutcherson, a clinical professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Columbia University. This kit can ease you into bondage, starting with a dice game that leads to someone getting tied up, blindfolded and lightly whipped. $29.95 MyPleasure.com

10. Get Lucky Grab Bag If you’re feeling indecisive or prefer 100 percent surprise, opt for this goody bag, featuring expert-selected erections rings, dildos, lubricants, vibrators and more. MyPleasure.com $39.95 ($130 value)

Keep in mind that respect for yourself and others and healthy, safe sexual habits are some of the most precious gifts of all. Toward that end, wash toys with warm soapy water after use and read product packaging for additional care instructions.

For more sexy fun, including candy cane dildos, penis wrap and cookies gone wild (yowza!) check out Merry Hubby’s XXX Christmas on Natalie Hartford’s blog.

Your turn! About 45 percent of women admit to having used sex toys alone or with a partner, according to numerous studies. Are you among them? Planning to give or receive sensual gifts? Any funny, wacky or wonderful experiences to share? All respectful thoughts are welcome. ♥